Do I contradict myself? Fine. I contradict myself. I contain multitudes. Its a bit inevitable. I believe to be a perfect human being you should avoid as many contradictions as possible. Especially contradicting emotions. While I was receiving therapy I learned that’s its okay to feel conflicting emotions but its not okay to portray them or act upon them. If you feel like you’re about to defy logic in a certain situation you’ll end up defying the situation, it’ll become a problem and it won’t be solved. It’ll store in your mind like a casette. A casette that we know is outdated but can still cause problems if reeled out.
I also accepted things about myself. Oh so many. By now if you’re a frequent reader of my blog paraphernalia; I’m exorbitantly emotional. Emotionally intelligent. Existential. Expressive and perhaps a bit insane. My emotional connundrum within my spirit exists because I live the way I write. Paradoxical and hopeful. Two extremes that can only exist probably in blue print. But I manage(d) to manifest that it can. You can’t feel joy and the pain at the same time? Says who? /: Not me.
I figured that if you’re faced with a problem you should deal with it straighforward. Bring your emotions in, do not deny them but do not let them dictate or confront the situation. You will be most taken advantage of and manipulated. Learn to express yourself its a secret of the intelligent. Do not compromise to avoid a necessary argument. The quickest way to defeat a beast is not to be gentle but to show him you can be rough. Settle your contradictions by admitting that you have a confliction. Feel your happy sorrow and choose your words wisely.